An Old Friend: Version B Part 13

“Well, I have to say that dinner was lovely,” Lisa smiled as she and Michael exited the Red Lion.  “And the MacNultys couldn’t have been nicer.”
 
Michael nodded.  “Yes, much as I hate to admit it, old Mark was right.  Very warm and charming couple there…and the black pudding was quite extraordinary.”
 
Lisa looked at him and grimaced.  “I still can’t believe you like that,” she giggled.
 
“I don’t just like it, Lisa.  It’s my favorite,” he corrected her with a wry smile.
 
Lisa wrinkled her nose.  “Oh, pull the other one! It’s your favorite???”
 
Michael blushed slightly and nodded.
 
“Oh, goodness.  See, I knew I had to find some fault with you, Michael.  And to think, we were doing so well…tut tut,” she said facetiously as she shook her head.
 
 Michael shot her a surprised look.  After a moment, clarity shone through his eyes as he realized what she was up to and decided to play along. “Oh, Lisa, you’re not going to make me give up black pudding, are you?” he asked with a mock tone of fearfulness.
 
A slight smirk appeared on Lisa’s face as she looked at him.  He playfully rolled his eyes and sighed. “Drat. Now I have to choose between two things, neither of which I can possibly live without…”
 
Lisa raised an eyebrow.
 
“Black pudding or Lisa? Lisa or black pudding?” he muttered in a seemingly agonizing way.
 
“I can’t believe this! You’re actually deciding between me and chopped liver??” she said in a mock incredulous tone.
 
Michael gasped theatrically.  “Lisa! Black pudding isn’t chopped liver! How could you utter such blasphemy?!”
 
Lisa continued looking at him with a raised eyebrow, actually a bit surprised at how far they were both carrying this.  She began to smirk and within seconds, she began giggling infectiously.  It wasn’t long before Michael joined her. “Oh, we’re really being silly, aren’t we?” he said between giggles. 
 
Lisa nodded and stopped giggling long enough to give him a kiss on the cheek.  Michael returned the kiss and patted her on the back. 
 
“To be fair, I can’t believe that you detest it,” he continued as they made their way back to his car.
 
Lisa shrugged.  “What can I say?  My grandmother used to make it all the time when I was young…”
 
“Oh my, what a wonderful childhood you had, Lisa,” Michael said facetiously.  “I got my first taste of black pudding quite late in life…near twenty-three or so.  I’m envious.”
 
She beamed at him as he giggled.  He looked so cute when he giggled. “Anyway, gradually I got sick of it, and would rejoice whenever we had lamb chops…or chicken…anything but black pudding.  Then, after I graduated from university, Mum and Dad moved away, and she came to live with me.  She insisted on cooking every night, as she felt bad that I would come home from work exhausted.  I appreciated it – to a point.  I suppose you can guess what she made every night?” she finished with a wry grin.
 
“Ah, let me guess,” Michael began, eyes narrowing. “… Hmm, would it perchance consist of two words, the first one beginning with a ‘b’ and ending with a ‘k’, and the second one beginning with a ‘p’ and ending with ‘i-n-g?’” he asked hopefully.
 
Lisa broke out in giggles.  “That’s correct!  My, you’re good, Michael!”
 
Michael shrugged nonchalantly.  “It was just a lucky guess,” he said dismissively before grinning at her.
 
Lisa calmed down.  “Well, anyway, toward the end, when she started falling ill, she got a little…funny.  You know, forgetful, not understanding what she read in the paper, etcetera.  One evening, I had just come home after working overtime at the library.  She had just made dinner and insisted that I sit down.  Of course, it was black pudding again.  I was hesitant to eat it this time, though, because it just didn’t look right, you know?” She looked back up at Michael.
 
Michael furrowed his brow thoughtfully and shook his head.  “No, can’t say that I do, I'm afraid.  I’ve never experienced bad black pudding.  At any rate, go on,” he prodded.
 
“Well, she kept insisting that I eat it – it’s good for me, it’ll put some color in my cheeks –“
 
“What???” Michael blurted out incredulously, before dissolving into laughter.  “That is what she said??”
 
Lisa grinned and nodded, averting her eyes. 
 
“Oh, dear.  I’ve been offered many reasons for eating black pudding, but I can’t say I’ve ever heard that one before,” he said in between chuckles, as he wiped tears of laughter from his eyes. He calmed down and looked at her expectantly, wanting to hear the rest of the story.
 
“I couldn’t understand why she was so insistent.  Apparently she thought she had done a marvelous job making it – she made it herself, you know.  I reluctantly tried a bit, and thought I was going to vomit right in my seat,” she recounted disgustedly.
 
Michael furrowed his brow in confusion and looked at her curiously.
 
“I don’t know what she did to it.  At first I thought the pudding had escaped from the casing, but…”  Lisa paused as her eyes narrowed and she began to appear sickened. “I’m sorry, I get a bit disgusted just thinking about it,” she said.
 
“No worries,” Michael smiled.
 
Lisa nodded and waited until the sick feeling left her. “Alright.  Anyway, perhaps she added the wrong ingredients…I don’t know what she did, and I didn’t ask, as she would be hurt.  All I know is that she did something different, and it wasn’t enough for me to stomach.  I excused myself and ran into the bathroom, where I nearly puked my guts out.  Since then, I can’t bring my lips to ever touch black pudding.”
 
Michael looked at her and nodded. “Well, that’s certainly a reasonable excuse,” he said thoughtfully.  “Though it is a shame that you’re missing out only because your grandmother botched the recipe.”
 
Lisa shrugged.  “Sorry, Michael,” she smiled.
 
Michael smiled back.  “Quite alright, Lisa.  Liking the same foods is not a necessity for being involved in a relationship.”
 
“That’s a good thing,” she giggled.  “Speaking of which – how do you feel about fish and chips, Michael?”
 
“Oh, I like a good fish n’ chips,” he said.  “It’s not as high on my list as black pudding, but it’s a close second.”
 
“Ah, good, then we’re making progress,” she grinned as she playfully touched one of his dimples.
 
“That’s your favorite, then?” he asked her curiously.
 
Lisa nodded.
 
“Oh, please! That’s so pathetic!”  he scoffed as he grinned widely at her.
 
 “Oh, and your black pudding isn’t?” she said in a mock challenging tone.  “All it means is that you have a cast iron stomach.  Is that supposed to be a badge of honor?”
 
“No, but it means I have a much more refined taste,” he said with an heir of smugness.
 
Lisa rolled her eyes and swatted him across the chest.
 
“Ow, that hurt,” he retorted, giving her a pouty look. 
 
“Good,” Lisa smirked.  “That will teach you to insult my tastes.”
 
“Well, I have to admit that I did survive,” he said as he looked down at his chest.  “There’s another badge of honor for me – surviving Lisa’s attacks.”
 
She stuck her tongue out playfully and swatted him again.
 
“Hey! That doesn’t mean I needed to be attacked again!” he said defensively as she made her way to the passenger’s side of his car and opened the door.  She grinned as she noticed him looking at her through the window with sad puppy dog eyes.
 
“Alright, I’m sorry, Michael,” she giggled as he got in.
 
“Apology accepted,” he smiled.  “I just hope that my love of black pudding won’t get in the way of our relationship.”
 
“It shouldn’t, so long as you don’t force me to eat it,” she winked.
 
“Damn,” he said in mock disappointment, which caused her to giggle.  He smiled at her and reached over to kiss her before they headed off.
 

****************************************************************************

 
Lisa hummed along to music coming over the speaker system in the supermarket.  It appeared to be a Stevie Wonder song, one which she had never heard before.  She couldn’t figure out the title, but he was singing something about someone creeping into his dreams.  She had gone just more than halfway down the aisle when she spotted a large assortment of Walker’s Shortbread.  She headed over to the shelf and dropped a few boxes into her basket.  Her mother had always had plenty of it in the house - especially around Christmas - since Lisa was young, and it had become a guilty pleasure of hers. 
 
She looked down at her watch and realized it was near 9 pm.  She decided she better finish up and find Michael as it was getting late.  After Michael had parked the car, she noticed a woman’s clothier and thought she might have luck finding a sweater there.  Michael wanted to poke around some of the other shops, so they parted ways.  She did succeed in finding a nice, warm, wool sweater that was reasonably priced, and she couldn’t wait to change out of her still smelly sweater that she had worn to Doune. 
 
As for Michael, he didn’t tell her where he was going, but she thought she saw him heading toward a jeweler’s.  At first, she wondered why he would have a need to go there.  Then she thought she was being silly for wondering such a thing.  She began to wonder if he was going to surprise her with a gift – maybe a necklace or earrings.  She didn’t have pierced ears, though, so that would be out of the question. 
 
She silently berated herself for speculating on this.  If it was a surprise, couldn’t she just leave it at that and not even think about it?  For some reason, she felt an excited anticipation inside of her that she tried to quash, at least for the time-being.  For the most part she was successful.
 
She began to hum more as she strolled down the aisle.  The song wasn’t exactly her favorite, but it was beginning to grow on her and it was nice to just hum along to.  She decided to pick up another couple of tins of shortbread before turning right and nearly bumping into someone.
 
“Oh, dear, Lisa’s hoarding the shortbread,” she heard the slightly bewildered, though familiar, voice utter.
 
She looked up and saw Michael looking at her basket amusedly.  “Think you’ve got enough there?” he asked as he raised an eyebrow.
 
“Probably not, but after purchasing that sweater I only have so much money left,” she said facetiously. 
 
“Oh, right, the sweater,” he said. 
 
“Would you like to see it?” she asked, gesturing toward the white, paper bag she was holding in her right hand.
 
“Yea, alright,” he said jokingly with a bit of a cockney accent.
 
Lisa grinned at him before setting the bag down on top of the basket.  She unrolled the top of the bag and removed the light blue, wool sweater.
 
“Very nice,” Michael nodded.  “Oh – that isn’t wool, is it?” he suddenly asked.
 
“This is Scotland, Michael,” Lisa replied, raising an eyebrow. 
 
“Ah, yes, how could I forget that?” he said cheekily.
 
Lisa giggled.  “Yes, it is,” she replied.
 
“Oh.  Better keep it away from me, then.  I have an allergy to wool,” he said as he playfully backed away from the sweater and nearly bumped into the shelf behind him.
 
Lisa giggled once more.  “Oh, poor baby.  How do you carry on in that knight costume, then?”
 
“What?” Michael asked, momentarily confused.
 
“That chain mail that you have to wear.  Isn’t it knitted wool?”
 
“Oh bugger.  She’s on to us,” Michael joked, his eyes widened.
 
Lisa looked at him curiously.
 
“Well, Lisa, now that our secret’s out,” he said as he looked around conspiratorially.  “I’m afraid I’ll have to kill you.”
 
“Oh, pity,” she replied with a mock pout on her face.  ‘I drove so many miles up here, just to be with you after five long years, and you have to murder me.”
 
“Yes, I’m afraid I have no choice,” Michael said calmly.  He started at Lisa for a few minutes before his calm façade shattered and he broke out in a wide grin.  “Damn, I’m not very good at keeping a straight face,” he giggled. 
 
“You were joking there, weren’t you?” Lisa asked him as she began to giggle as well.
 
“Yes, love, only joking,” he said softly as the giggles ceased.  He pulled her into a quick hug, and after a moment she noticed the small bag he was holding.
 
“So, what have you got there?” she asked curiously once they pulled apart.
 
Michael looked down at the bag for a second and then stuffed it into his jacket pocket. “Oh, er…it’s nothing,” he said dismissively.
 
Lisa raised an eyebrow.  “Really,” she said, not seeming to be convinced.
 
A faint blush crept across Michael’s cheeks as he nodded. 
 
Lisa looked at him curiously and then merely shrugged.
 
“Alright,” Michael sighed.  “If you must know, I bought a pair of earrings for my mum.  She turned seventy…er…a few months ago, actually,” he said as his blush deepened a bit.  “I’ve just been so busy with the Pythons, writing for this film, doing the Drury Lane show and all that, I didn’t have time to get her a proper gift.”
 
Lisa raised her eyebrows and nodded thoughtfully. “Well, that’s certainly nice of you,” she said.
 
“Oh, it’s nothing.  As her only son I feel obligated,” he returned. 
 
Lisa smiled at him and nodded. 
 
“Well, it’s getting late,” he suddenly said as he looked at his watch.  “We’d best be going.  Are you finished here – or do you wish to pick up more shortbread?” he grinned.
 
“No, I’m fine,” she giggled. 
 
Michael nodded and they made their way to the front of the store so Lisa could check out.  She was so busy she didn’t notice Michael stuffing the small bag further into his jacket pocket as he waited near the exit for her. “All ready?” he asked, raising his eyebrows, as she headed toward him with her shopping bag.
 
She nodded and they made their way back out to the car park and over to Michael’s car. 
 
As they headed back to the hotel, Michael reached over and caressed Lisa’s hand every so often.  He realized how much he loved her, and he hoped he had done the right thing.  As for Lisa, all she could think of was how much she was enjoying herself being in Michael’s company, and how she wanted to spend every waking moment with him.
 

****************************************************************************

 
Meanwhile, back at the hotel, a very sullen Eric was sitting down at the bar, alternating between staring at his half-drunk pint and looking multiple times at his watch.  It was just after 9:30 pm.  He knew that Mike and Lisa had gone out to dinner, but that was about four hours ago.  What could possibly be taking them so long?  Michael had promised him that they would have a drink at the bar with him. 
 
Eric didn’t want to admit that he still couldn’t get Lisa out of his mind.  He realized that she only wanted to be friends, that she was Michael’s girl, and that she was quite angry when he was watching her change out of her costume.  He knew that she wasn’t quite pleased with him at the moment, but he didn’t care.  He also knew that Mike was one of his best friends, and he didn’t want to piss him off any further.  Michael had seemingly forgiven him for what had happened the previous night, and he was usually an agreeable person, but Eric knew better.  After witnessing Michael blow his stack (rightfully) that night, he didn’t want to push him further over the edge.  It was the first time Eric realized that Mike was capable of losing his temper.  He didn’t want to do or say anything that would cause an irreparable rift between them.
 
He took a sip from his pint, looked at his watch again, and sighed angrily. 
 
“Oh, Hello, Eric,” Terry Jones remarked as entered the bar area.
 
“What??” Eric snapped at him.
 
Jonesy’s face contorted in confusion.  “I just said ‘Hello.’  What’s wrong with you?” he asked incredulously.
 
Eric sighed again.  “Sorry, Jonesy.  I’m a bit tense at the moment.”
 
“I can see that,” Jonesy said dryly as he raised an eyebrow.
 
“Have you seen Mike at all?” Eric blurted out.
 
“No, I haven’t.  Why?” he asked curiously.
 
“Oh…I suppose it’s silly,” Eric said dismissively.  “I was just supposed to meet him for a drink about now.”
 
Jonesy looked at him thoughtfully and then shrugged.  “Last I heard he and that girl of his were going to dinner.”
 
Eric looked back up at Jonesy with a piercing stare.  “I know,” he said sharply.
 
Jonesy ignored Eric’s obvious displeasure with the fact.  “I think they were going to the Red Lion.  Mark will be quite pleased,” he smirked.
 
“Mmm,” Eric intoned as he took another drink.
 
“Well, see you in the morning, Eric,” Jonesy started as he decided to head back upstairs.  “If I were you I wouldn’t expect Mike to show up anytime soon.  I reckon they’re spending a bit of time romancing,” he grinned widely, raising his eyebrows.
 
“Shut up!!” Eric yelled at Jonesy’s retreating form.  He sighed miserably as he heard Jonesy retreating upstairs and laughing heartily.
 
At last, Eric finished up his pint and paid the bartender.  He refused another drink, and decided he’d sit and read for a bit.  After about half an hour, he made his way back upstairs.
 

****************************************************************************

 
“Oh, Hello, Eric,” Michael said, giving Eric a curious look as he opened his door.
 
“Alright, spill it, Mike,” Eric spat out as he folded his arms over his chest.  “What’s your excuse??”
 
Michael looked at Eric and furrowed his brow in confusion. “What? What are you talking about?”
 
“Oh, what, do you have amnesia now?” Eric said dryly. 
 
“I don’t understand.”
 
Eric looked at him incredulously.  
 
“Oh, shit,” Michael said dreadfully, shutting his eyes.  “Were we supposed to –“
 
“Meet down at the bar for a little drinkie-poo? Yeah, that’s the beat of it,” Eric interrupted in a biting fashion.
 
“Oh, Christ, Eric, I’m sorry,” Michael said regretfully.  “We went to dinner and then went shopping afterwards.  I lost track of the time and I reckoned you wouldn’t be up for a drink so late.”
 
“Ha, right, shopping, that’s good,” Eric scoffed. 
 
Michael furrowed his brow in confusion.
 
“Don’t ask me to do the ‘Nudge Nudge, Wink Wink’ routine, Mike, because I’m just not up to it,” he said, a bit of an angry edge in his quiet tone.
 
Mike’s eyes narrowed. “Look, Eric, I don’t know what you’re insinuating, but I don’t want to discuss this any further.  We went shopping, and that was it – just shopping,” Michael spat out, a huge emphasis on the last two words. 
 
Eric continued to look at him with his arms folded over his chest, as if he was waiting for a more suitable explanation.
 
“Here, you want proof?” Michael suddenly asked.  He turned back inside, headed over to one of the beds and grabbed Lisa’s bag from the supermarket.  “There you are.  Look inside and see for yourself,” he spat out as he thrust the bag angrily at Eric. 
 
Eric jumped a bit, not expecting Mike to react like this, and he reached inside the bag.  He looked at the boxes and tins of shortbread, and noticed the receipt.  Once he realized that the date and time printed on it checked out, he blushed madly.  He looked up at Michael who had his arms folded across his chest and was glaring at Eric.  “Oh.  I….I….uh,” he sputtered.
 
Michael raised his eyebrows expectantly at Eric.
 
“I’m…sorry, Mike,” he quickly muttered as he looked down at his feet.
 
“What was that?”
 
Eric slowly looked back up at Michael, still blushing madly. “I’m sorry I was so suspicious.  I saw Jonesy down there before and he made some…remark that set me off,” Eric elaborated, sounding exhausted.
 
“Oh, why doesn’t that stupid git mind his own business?” Michael said facetiously as he shook his head.
 
Eric cracked a quick smile and started to giggle once he caught sight of the slight grin that formed on Michael’s face. “Is that any way to talk about your best friend, Mike?” he chided in between giggles.
 
“The hell it is.  We may be best friends, but he’s certainly fallen out of favor with me because of the constant whining, arguing and brow-beating we’ve been treated to,” Michael said cheekily.
 
Eric stopped laughing and sighed as he calmed down. “I’m serious, Mike.  I’m sorry for being so suspicious.  I was just a bit disappointed that we couldn’t meet for a drink and chat.”
 
“That’s alright, Eric.  I’m sorry I forgot about it.  I can’t imagine that Terry is any good company at the moment.”
 
Eric shook his head and grinned. 
 
“Michael? What’s going on?” Lisa’s voice suddenly sounded from the bathroom as she emerged from the shower. Eric’s eyes widened a bit as he heard her voice. 

Michael didn’t take much notice as he turned toward the bathroom. “It’s just Eric, love.  I forgot that we were supposed to meet him for a drink.  But it’s alright, everything is fine,” he called back to her. He turned back to Eric and saw him staring with a glazed look in his eyes. “Well, I suppose we should be turning in.  It’s getting quite late,” Michael said to him as he pointed to his watch.
 
Eric didn’t answer him, but was still mired in his glazed stare.
 
“Er…Eric?’ Michael asked curiously as he furrowed his brow in confusion.
 
Eric finally broke his stare as he heard Mike’s voice and looked at him. “Hmm? Oh…sorry.  Right, I’d better turn in as well.  I reckon Jonesy and Gilliam are going to drag us out there early tomorrow,” he said dryly.
 
Michael nodded grimly.  “’Night, Eric,” he said just before he shut the door.
 
“Goodnight, Mike,” Eric returned after the door was shut.  He looked at it, a bit confused, and then started down the hall toward his room.
 

***********************************************************************

 
Michael anxiously glanced down at Lisa's sleeping form.  It was 12:30 am, and he had suddenly been struck with an idea.  He was well aware that she was going to be heading back to London in the morning, and he wanted to have one last little fling with her.  Again, he had felt very bad about what had taken place the previous night, where the fight between he and Eric resulted in Eric dragging her away from him.  The idea of Lisa being placed in the middle of this ridiculous altercation made him feel sick.  He wanted to go out and do something fun with her, something that only the two of them could do privately and remain out of site from the other Pythons.
 
“Lisa,” he whispered.
 
When she did not respond, he nudged her. “Lisa?” he repeated, this time a bit louder.
 
Finally she stirred.  “Mmm?” she intoned sleepily. 
 
Her eyes focused and she caught sight of Michael standing over her, dressed in his pajamas and a pair of shoes.  He was smiling knowingly at her.
 
“Michael? What’s going on? What time is it?” she asked curiously.
 
“Half past midnight,” he grinned. 
 
Lisa raised an eyebrow.
 
“Come on,” he said.  “I was thinking we could take a nice drive through the countryside.”
 
She furrowed her brow at first, but then smiled slightly.  “Oh, that sounds lovely,” she replied, her smile widening.  “But can you give me a few moments to change?”
 
“Oh, no, there’s no need for that,” he insisted as he shook his head.  “I’m going like this, so it’s no problem.”
 
She gave him an odd look.  “In your pajamas? May I ask why?”
 
“Don’t worry, love.  You’ll see when we get there,” he winked.
 
Lisa rolled her eyes and grinned as she stepped into her shoes.  She slipped her coat on, and Michael grabbed his car keys and jacket before they made their way out of the room.

*************************************************************************

 
'Ah, this is perfect,' Michael thought to himself as they quietly made their way down the stairs.  The man at the front desk had stepped away, and no one was around.  Finally he and Lisa could be alone together without anyone barging in on them. 
 
They were about to head out the door when a loud thump caught their attention.  Michael turned in the direction of the noise, but didn’t see anything.  Whatever – or whoever – caused this sound was hidden away.  A feeling of dread welled up inside Michael as he thought someone could have been watching them. “Hello?” he called out nervously.
 
His call was answered when a small, black cat leapt off the sofa near the fireplace and made its way behind the front desk.  Michael shut his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief as he remembered that it was one of the owner’s two cats.
 
Lisa put her hand to her heart and caught her breath. “She really scared me for a minute there,” she exclaimed breathlessly.
 
Michael nodded as his eyes followed the cat through the door behind the front desk.  He turned back to Lisa and gave her a little smile. “Come on, love,” he said as he took her hand and pushed the door open with his free hand.
 
As they stepped outside, Lisa was surprised at how mild it seemed.  It was never really that warm in this part of Scotland, but the rain and overcast skies that plagued them seemed to have moved on and it actually seemed to be a bit warmer than it had been earlier. “Please, Michael, tell me where we’re going?” she smiled at him before they entered the car.
 
“Don’t worry, you’ll see when we get there,” he grinned impishly.
 
Lisa rolled her eyes.  “Alright, but it had better be good,” she said wryly as they got inside. 
 
Michael chuckled slightly before answering. “No, I think you’ll find it’s quite good,” he said.
 
Lisa looked at him and smiled as Michael put the car into gear and they headed off.




 


 



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