Sir
Robin and the Dragon
Rating: PG
Robin
is skipping along with his minstrels singing behind him. All of a
sudden, he hears a roar.
Robin: (Holding hand up in air) Shut
up!
(Minstrels look crestfallen and give him dirty
looks)
Robin: (Quaking) who goes there?
(Robin stops
quaking as a baby dragon comes over the hill. He walks over to
him)
Baby Dragon: eep.
Robin: AWWWW! (Tickles dragon
under chin) Cootchie Cootchie Cooooo
(Robin grins as baby
dragon begins to giggle and coo. He turns and goes back to his
minstrels with the little dragon following)
Robin: Hey guys!
You'll never believe what I found! A baby dragon!
(Robin looks
confused as the minstrels and his horse began to quake with fear and
point behind his shoulder)
Robin (stares at them in disbelief)
What? IT'S JUST A BABY DRAGON. WHAT KIND OF SISSIES ARE YOU. HE'S
ONLY...(he turns around to point at the baby dragon only to find that
the baby dragon is now towering 50 feet above him)
Robin:
SHIT!!!!! (He screams as a brown stain appears on his clothes) RUN
AWAY! RUN AWAY!!
(Robin runs frantically as the ground rocks
and rolls under him with the dragon's footsteps. he runs over a hill
and straight into Sir Galahad and topples over on him)
Sir
Galahad: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Robin:
(blubbering) DRAGON...DRAGON...BIG.... 50...FEET.... PROTECT
ME!!!!!!!
Sir Galahad (looks over Robins shoulder) Are you
insane?
Robin: Well what does it look like to you?
Sir
Galahad: Like a baby dragon
(Robin spins around to see that
the dragon is now little again. He looks back at Sir Galahad as he
pushes him off)
Robin: Well it was 50 feet a few minutes
ago
Sir Galahad: Suuuuuure, it was (He looks at Robins shit
stained tunic and looks down in horror at his own tunic now stained
in the same shit) LOOK WHAT YOU DID, YOU STUPID GIT! HOW AM I
SUPPOSED TO BE HEROIC LOOKING LIKE THIS?"
Robin: Cover it
with your shield! I always do. (He runs as Sir Galahad lobs a chunk
of earth at his head)
(Sir Galahad goes and sits down next to
the baby dragon. The dragon looks at him sorrowfully)
Sir
Galahad: Damn that cowardly bastard! Now how am I gonna get this
stain out! This is my best tunic! Some people have no decency, you
know...(He turns to look at the baby dragon and sees only a gigantic
dragon foot) I...I...I...AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. (He runs back over the
hill as the dragon roars behind him. Finding Sir Robin, He jumps into
his arms and Sir Robin runs with Sir Galahad in his arms)
Narrator:
AND SO ROBIN AND SIR GALAHAD AND THE HORSES AND MINSTRELS RAN AND RAN
AND RAN AND JUST WHEN IT SEEMED HOPELESS, THE ANIMATOR SUFFERED A
SECOND FATAL HEART ATTACK
(Terry Gilliam topples over as he
urrps)
Narrator: AND SO THE DRAGON WAS NO MORE.
The end