Best Friends Forever, Chapter Eleven


"We could go early," Nadia repeated, and hissed as her finger was burned by the dish in the oven. She doubled the potholders and tried again, this time finding that she hadn't seared her flesh.

Eric shrugged in a distracted way. "We could, I suppose. Hey, the guys are coming over tonight-"

She straightened up. "Why?"

"Terry's place is being renovated, Mike is a wacko, Gray needs to clean, John has a girlfriend, Terry Gilliam lives in a box, and I have an open space." He blinked at her.

"You have a girlfriend too, you know." She pointed out, holding a spoon out like a sword. He plucked a spatula from the pottery on the shelf and held it out like her.

"Ah, but I don't mind if they see you like John minds. You don't mind, do you?" He swatted at her with the utensil.

Nadia ducked the plastic and jabbed him sharply with the end of the spoon. "I guess not. But if I have to feed them and this is shit, they asked for it. Maybe I'll put laxatives in it and they'll never come back-"

"Aw, don't repel them; they like you!" He hugged her from behind when she retreated to check the steaming dish.

"When are they getting here?" She asked, ignoring the kisses he was putting on her neck and shoulders.

Eric glanced at his watch. "Oh, about ten, fifteen minutes."

She laughed. "When were you planning on telling me this?"

"Before they came, after you cooked." He replied without hesitation. "You cooked, Naddy." He added, and she rolled her eyes.

"Yes, and it looks like an outerspace alien's vomit. Care to try?" She held up the spoon and he carefully dug in, a look of mild surprise crossing his face.

"What is it?"

"Outerspace Alien Space Vomit Casserole," she replied and he feigned a choke on the food. "Otherwise known as Roasted Vegetable and Cheese with Pasta."

"So you put what in it?" He asked, starting to back away before he was tempted to eat the whole thing.

"Not important, you should just get your little friends here and eat before someone tries to eat it all first." She waved him off and turned on the light in the laundry room, sitting before the easel again. Eric had been trying to figure out what she was painting from the day she started it, but as of yet could not see it. At first it looked like a landscape, but it wasn't anymore. Now it looked like a person. Every time he tried to talk to her while she sat in that seat, she went temporarily deaf. He'd ask her a question and she would sit, eyes tuned to the blank canvas, brush in hand, paint on pallet. She sometimes would jump when he stepped into her view, but then she was blind to him as well, painting and talking to herself in French. Before she got the paints out, Eric took it upon himself to ask her a question.

"What language do you think in?" He asked, leaning to catch her eye.

She turned and cocked her head. "I don't know, I guess it depends on what I'm thinking about."

"Me?" He asked, but it was more of an invitation.

"Quand je pense de vous, Eric, je pense dans la langue la plus belle de tout: le français." She replied, and he smiled.

"Very cute," he said with a grin, and turned to answer the door.

Once the door was open and the guys uneasily slid in, he noticed Nadia was talking to herself again.

"Anyone hungry?" He asked, trying to cover the sound up.

John's stomach growled. "Oh, I think I am." He started to smile, but a noise distracted them.

"Shit! Je vais vous tuer, Aphrodite!" There was a sharp slam and a shaken looking cat sauntered into the room. She mewled at Eric and he bent to make sure Nadia hadn't kicked her, but she just looked like a frightened cat, not an abused one.

He stood and put his hands on his hips, standing before the laundry room door. "Nadia!" He sounded stern, and the guys could only poke their heads around the corner, curiosity getting the better of them.

The door swung open and her face peered out, paint smeared on some parts, the entire left lens speckled with blue and gray shades. "Que?"

"Don't kill the cat, please." He replied.

She made a face. "I'll kill the cat if I want to! Look what she did!" She pulled her arms from behind her where a pair of scratches ran.

He made a face at her right back. "I'll get her declawed!"

Nadia was about to argue further when she noticed Gray standing behind Eric, a smile on his face.

"Fine," she stood and closed the door behind her, stopping by the kitchen sink to rinse the paint from her cuts and scratches, pausing to scratch the drying paint from her glasses, chipping most of it off.

Those who were hungry ate, excluding Terry Gilliam, who had showed up late and only sat without a word, taking a paper out for drawing. Nadia was always on good terms with him, and they often times could be seen on the roof smoking a cigarette and talking quietly about the art of drawing. Today Nadia seemed to be in an odd mood, and when the guys would have accused Eric of making the whole scenario up, the whole idea they were getting married, Nadia would trip up their trap.

They never seemed to want to touch or even catch glances in front of anyone, and if that was because they were shy, then they were all the Queen of England. The two were just not shy people, but when it came to affirmation of any kind, it was silence on their part. Mostly unbothered by this, the guys plowed on, but Nadia had to instigate some sort of riot or her purpose wouldn't be served.

Eric stood and started to make for the door which Nadia had left open when she ran out to get the mail and grabbed little Nimue and Merlin before they wondered out into the cold. He was looking up when Nadia returned, and he handed her the tiny bundles before jumping over the back of the couch to sit again, an unexpected sound emitting as she landed atop him, letting both of the animals go back into the wild.

"Oh, hi." He smiled as she curled up on his lap, somewhat tired.

"Bonjour," she muttered and he smiled again, lifted an arm to support her shoulders.

John snickered and then Nadia was wide awake.

"What's that?" She asked, cupping a hand to her ear.

"Oh, nothing." John retorted, rising to walk innocently from the room, but Nadia stood and blocked his path.

Eric snickered. "Don't piss her off, John, she could kick your ass."

There was some disbelieving laughter around the room. "Riiight,"

"I have a video, you don't have to kill them," Eric complained.

Her face lit up. "You have an actual video of me fighting? I don't even have one!"

Eric blushed lightly. "Well, it was the only fight you were knocked out before round twenty-eight, and it was the one where I thought you were dead and I ran up into the ring to make sure you were going to make it. Fifteen minutes of golden footage with you smacking at my head while I hugged you and nearly cried in front of near one thousand people. Of course I have a bloody copy." He smiled as the guys squirmed in apprehension.

"I'll have to watch that sometime," she relented her death stare on John and sat on Eric again.

There was a good pause of wonder as the guys realised that Nadia was shaping up to be a lot more than an ordinary girl.

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They left early. Snow was falling lazily on the buildings in the tiny and crowded town just outside Paris, the church bells rang all day and at midnight, but most of all it was the houses that Nadia dragged Eric into. The first one, the one she had grown up in-now a summer cottage-sat on a small inland lake with the Alps in the background of the whole scene. They had scaled the grounds then walked around inside the unheated building before Nadia drove him back to her parents' current home, a luxury building in downtown Paris. It was enormous, and the rooms they had been given for staying were also spacious. Too spacious, if Eric had an opinion. For one thing, he knew for a fact he wasn't going to set a finger on the bed in the room unless Nadia became inexplicably pissed at him in the next fourteen hours, and for another thing, each bedroom on that floor had a full bathroom with all the added luxuries.

"It's wonderful," Eric near-whispered to himself as Nadia led him to the balcony on the top floor. The scenery, the dull drone of the city in the distance, even the lights in the distance as the sun went down was comforting. He was in love with Paris almost as much as he was with her.

She smiled at him. "It's funny how a big, metal thing like the Eiffel Tower can make you proud to be a human. Just a human in general, too; there's no animosity whatsoever. You just think, 'People like me made that, people like me!' There's no, 'The proud French made that, my home country!'"

Eric smiled back at her. "I didn't see half the things I saw today on my first trip here."

"The tours usually don't stop at the Smart houses and show off the lovely architecture." She replied with a smirk. He nodded and returned to gazing out over the perfect blanket of white covering the city and her yard. She put her head on his shoulder and sighed, hugging a scarf she had knit herself tighter around her neck, waiting for the amazement of it all to stop drifting over Eric so they could return to the warmth. A full twenty minutes later, as he kissed the top of her head (covered in snowflakes or not), they heard some rapid speaking and footsteps and turned just as the balcony doors were thrown open and in the bright light stood her mother and father, looking worried until they finally found the couple.

Nadia's mother let out a relieved sigh. "Thank God you're here! I think for minute you two gone somewhere and got in accident!" Her English spilled from her like a flood, and Nadia could only smile reassuringly.

"We're here, safe and sound, Mama." She glanced at her father, who was throwing an amazingly soft gaze at Eric.

He took a quick step onto the balcony and pulled both Eric and Nadia's heads to his shoulders, a quick but compassionate gesture that simply told Eric he was perfectly at ease with him stealing his daughter away. Eric smiled at the man as he pulled away, the stern face back.

Abruptly Nadia's mother burst into heavy sobs, slapping at her husband with a happy look.

The next three days were all preparation for the wedding. Helen had roped Mike into coming that early, and as compensation, had talked Nadia into letting her be a bridesmaid for the ordeal. She had all sorts of great ideas for the dress, and was showing up the next day to help pick it out with Nadia's mother, Nadia, and Terry's wife, who would also be arriving early. Terry hadn't been too pleased about leaving all that early either; it meant less time with family, which led for bitter reunions the next time around. The house was big enough to house most of them, and those who were left roomless found it easy enough to pair up with someone who wasn't coming escorted.

Nadia was snapped out of her trance as her mother mumbled something about another set of grandkids, to which Nadia frowned upon. Her parents vacated the area, and Nadia decided it was time she found out just what Eric thought about children, the whole kid-raising concept. She knew what she wanted to say, but it all depended on him.

They sat down together in the drawing room, a sort of warm-looking library with a fireplace that roared at all hours of the night and a coffee and tea brewer hidden away in a corner for quick access of caffeine.

"What do you think about kids?" She asked as she poured herself a cup of tea, lifting her eyebrows in silent question.

Eric was caught off-guard. "Uh, well-"

"Tea?" She interrupted, eyes down.

"Yes, I think." None of his answers seemed like he had any thought behind them, because when she handed him the cup and sat down, he only stared at the leaves floating at the bottom, dumbstruck.

"Well?" She asked, impatient.

He shrugged and put the cup down, not knowing what he was going to say. "I don't know, Nadia. You know me and kids; I'm awful. Nothing that can't be cured by practice, like my mum says, of course."

She squirmed. "I know what I think. I'm a terrible mother but a great aunt and babysitter. I think if I had any kids I'd have no time for them and I'd be the single most horrendous example for them ever. Not to mention the entire pregnancy thing. You have a fourth of a responsibility to fill in there. You help me get started, I feed it, comfort it, and make sure it has a welcome into the world when the time comes. Then you get to take half again." She nodded her head decisively. "It'd be dead in three months, no doubt."

"Don't say that," Eric smiled, "you know that people tend to do much better when they're in a crisis. People like us, anyway. Hand us a kid in a crisis and we'd probably do a pretty good job."

"So, is that a full gutting of my opinion? Because I'm not saying never, just not anytime soon for me." She felt like he was pushing her backwards. Ten minutes ago the thought of rearing a child made her want to throw up, now she was considering?

He shrugged. "I'll do whatever you want to do. Kids should be a two-way concept, right?"

She smiled in a bemused way. "It does take two to tango."

"Settled then. Let's move onto something where I feel a little less like any second now I'm going to fall out of this chair and die." He smiled in a nervous way.

Nadia stood and sat on his lap with a pout. "Aww, you feel nervous?"

He let her kiss him for a moment, agreeing quietly into her mouth until he ran out of breath and took in a deep gulp of her fragrance. He smiled for a moment, unable to stop it, then made himself aware of the careful footsteps coming their way.

She pulled off just as the door swung open again, and her mother stood, at her side an older woman of about forty-five, and with her was a rack of white dresses, all about Nadia's size.

"Tomorrow we begin!" Shouted the woman, and she swept Nadia into a tight hug with a laugh, pulling back to survey the man that had made himself a cushion.

"Is this the groom or what?" She asked in French, looking straight into Eric's eyes.

Nadia nodded carefully, waiting for her mother's friend's opinion.

"His face tells me I should leave you two alone again." Quipped the woman, and Nadia turned quickly, not expecting to see Eric's face a dull red.

"Why the blush?" She asked what felt like the millionth time since the entire dating "thing" had begun.

He looked at her. "Why don't we just strip right here and go at it on the table, eh Nadia? We need a locked room for Christ's sake!" He smiled at himself and turned away.

Returning to Claudette, Nadia ignored Eric's fidgeting. "We can start tomorrow, Claudette."

"Fantastic!" She clapped her hands and walked from the room, chin up proudly. The door was swinging shut when it snapped open again and Lexi stomped in, shaking snow from her coat.

"Didn't think I'd miss this, did you?" She asked with a grin, eyeing Nadia's dropped jaw nervously.

She stood and hugged Lexi, not quite sure how she was going to react. What if she was overcome with her damn impulses at the wedding and stopped them? What if she had a dirty little secret to share with Nadia? WHAT IF?

"Where's the honeymoon?" Lexi pressed, sitting down after pouring herself some tea. Nadia sat dumbly and glanced at Eric, who was staring straight up at the ceiling, counting the planks that crossed the wood. He was always uncomfortable around Lexi it seemed; she was casual and still stared at him like any moment words would spill from her mouth. "Remember that night on the beach?" Christ, of course he fucking remembered the night on the beach! He did not want to relive it by glancing into her eyes, where every second she met stares she replayed the look in his eye when she fell to the sandy shore and he had done the sweetest thing...

It wasn't all that sweet, now that he thought about it. She'd twisted her ankle in the fire pit and fallen as a group of teenagers walked by and shoved her. The rocks had lacerated something on the back of her knee, and Eric was slightly perterbed by the way the bleeding had a slight pulse. Thinking she might bleed to death before he could get her to a doctor, he'd taken off his shirt in the fifty-something degree weather and tied a rough tourniquet on her leg and carried her to his car. The entire time she was whimpering and apologizing, and all he could think was, "She's going to die in the car and I'm going to have a bleeding body there. God, woman, you better make it!" In the slight hysteria, Lexi had started to pass in and out of consciousness until Eric felt her breathing stop. He put her down on a picnic table and tried to figure out what had happened, but she had sat up again, and he knew she was alright. She had started to cry, and Eric, frantic to have her quiet so he could think, had kissed her over and over again until she was at a loss for words and shaking in his arms. Once at the hospital though, the interlude ended abruptly, a a week later he broke up with her.

Even now Lexi would look at Eric and remember how selfless he could be. Nadia couldn't know that, could she? She'd always done things for herself, never one to ask for help. How the hell could she know what Eric was like when he was afraid? He put a front for her, even Lexi could tell. He tried to be laid back and calm; she couldn't know what he was like that night. He couldn't know how much he still meant to her.

"We don't know," Nadia said suddenly, throwing Lexi from her thoughts.

"Well, jet lag is taking its toll; I'm off to bed. Think about Cancun; I hear it's nice." She said stiffly, then stretched her shoulders and stood, looking better than she had the moment before. She waved to Eric blankly and stalked off to the room Nadia's mother had shown her to.

Eric looked up over his hands and waited for Nadia to move. When she did her movements were graceful and slow, like she was thinking too hard to really notice what she was doing. "Let's go somewhere private; I'm sick of people wandering in here looking for us."

He nodded stupidly and followed her to her room, whereupon the door closed and he felt his back land in an impossibly soft bed. Nadia paused, uncertain, then felt Eric's hands on her hips, slowly and nervously pulling on her jeans. Her head mumbled a quiet, "Why not?"

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Lexi paced her room. So, maybe she did know. Maybe through all their time together now-another angry thought entered her head rudely. They'd disappeared moments after she'd left the room, like no one knew what they were doing. She wanted to scream. She should have known sooner! Of course they were fucking! Of course they were! Why else would the dolt think he loved her? Her fingers knotted themselves into a weak fist, and she felt her hand pop a sleeping pill into her mouth. A gulp of water, and in twenty minutes she'd be able to nod off without dreaming of them there, a floor down, doing whatever it was they were doing. That beautiful creature Eric, what the hell did he see in her anyway? He'd seen her wig out more than once; why would he set himself up with such a fragile thing? People like Nadia didn't find anyone special, they found drugs. Why was it taking her so bloody long? A few weeks ago Lexi would have been better off, but she'd found drugs and was now resentful. Her special someone couldn't be too far away, her ass! She was approaching thirty far too quickly for her taste. Twenty minutes ended abruptly, and she felt her hand clench into a fist once more as her body collapsed to sleep.

The morning had cleared her head enough to help her do the deed she now committed. Eric, peacefully sleeping, lay unaware as Lexi crept in, knowing her window of opportunity would close if she didn't take advantage of Nadia's absence. The bottle of baby aspirin in her hand, she opened the drawer of the elegantly adorned bathroom and grinned wickedly at the small, circular case. Flipping it open she saw nearly a full amount of birth control pills. She dumped these into hand impatiently, carefully putting the baby aspirin in the place of the pills, nearly identical. Lexi sincerely hoped Nadia didn't check every morning. A baby was one thing Nadia couldn't handle in her state; she'd probably get depressed and run off in shame before trying to raise the thing, leaving poor, broken Eric unable to take her back let alone get her back, leaving Lexi to take back what was rightfully hers.

Their honeymoon, no matter where it was had to be full of the newlywed sex, right? And if Lexi played her cards right, the one to two week period would sufficiently work all of the drug out of Naddy's precious system, and then the regular, married sex would take care of the rest. By the way Eric slept, Lexi didn't think it'd take more than three months, if she could continue the routine every month after Nadia renewed her dosage. It couldn't be that hard; she lived fifteen minutes away and could make an excuse to have an extra key around the house. She snapped the lid on the baby aspirin and started out of the bathroom, jumping as she saw Eric sitting straight up upon her entering the room.

He opened his mouth in horror. "What the hell are you doing?" He asked snappishly.

She held up the bottle. "Naddy's aspirin, got me a headache. Sorry to wake you." She gave him the sweetest smile she could and exited, hoping he didn't get too crushed when precious Naddy-kins called it quits on him. She'd be there to pick up the pieces, she vowed, and walked down the hall to the stairs.

Around noon Eric sauntered from Nadia's room into his own and changed into a set of clothes that was in the rare casual dress state. He wasn't quite sure why, but a real shirt appealed to him, and when he pulled it on and straightened everything, he felt an odd sense of peace overcome him. Normally nothing would put him quite in this mood like a good, long think. Once everything in his head was quieted he was left with the ringing in his mind's ears, but now, as he lit a cigarette and carefully inhaled and exhaled into the brittle air, the feeling settled uneasily on his shoulders, almost like a parrot making a perch, though he was a bit worried any second it'd bite his ear off. A hand tapped him on the shoulder, causing him to snap the window shut.

Lexi grinned at him innocently. "Didn't mean to startle you," she spoke softly.

"No problem," he smiled back at her uneasily and put out the cigarette with a quiet hiss into a glass ashtray.

She clucked her tongue at the other remains in the ashtray. "Nasty habit, Eric, you might want to quit."

It was then, of course, Nadia made her appearance, and she didn't look too pleased. Helen bounced in at her side, and a very uptight looking Mike poked his head in the door, extremely pleased to have found Eric.

"Thank God!" He cried and edged in. "I was afraid if I heard one more minute of that mindless babble I'd drown in my own femininity!" He briskly shook his head, and Eric snickered to see Helen's eyes attune to his hair, flying in every direction.

"Watch your back, Mike, scissors are in the first drawer on your left." He pointed to the desk, laughing as Mike spun and ducked without really paying attention to the fact his wife hadn't moved. He threw a dirty look at Eric and sat down, accepting a glass of liquor from his friend as they sat in the drawing room.

Nadia cleared her throat. "Getting my dress fitted, Lexi, you should come to get your dress fitted as well."

She jumped up, a grin on her face. "Alright, I'm coming!"

Poor wittle Naddy-kins...

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"Too perfect I tell you!" Nate shook Nadia's shoulders hysterically. For a moment Nadia lolled around and then she stopped, grabbing her brother's arms with a snap.

"Something will go wrong. I'll trip or something, better?" She asked, rearranging the dress on her.

Lexi poked her head around the corner. "Hey, Naddy? Can you try to throw that bouquet my way at some point?" She wagged her eyebrows comically, and a flower head hit her square in the face. Nadia rearranged the flowers and let her shoulders slouch.

Her mother's head poked around the corner above Lexi's. "He looks good in a tux-"

"I know, mother. Can I go yet?" Nadia pressed impatiently.

A piano started to play somewhere, and without waiting for an answer, Nadia walked from the curtained room with a slow gait, her arms at her side calmly. The dress she wore was exquisite, a sort of plain white strapless with folds where her curves made themselves apparent, a bunching cloth cascade on her lower back. Her mother had insisted on the veil tradition, and gave her a pair of contacts to wear for the ceremony, which felt bulky and weren't the proper prescription. She blinked a few times to adjust her vision and then heard the piano stop. She faked a trip, winked elaborately at her brother, and smiled broadly at Eric. His mouth was open a bit, looking her over a few times before giving her a quick wink.

The nuptials were quicker than they should have been. The priest talked and talked in rapid French before he waved elaborately to Eric, to which he replied with the proper response, and Nadia mirrored it. The ring was put on her finger, and one on his before they were technically man and wife. The veil lifted, and for the first time everyone saw them share a real kiss, one that wasn't pressed, forced, or awkward. They just kissed. Cheers broke out finally. Chaos entered the room uninvited as Lexi waited patiently for their wedding night to come with them miles away in their private room. Oh, it had to work. Her plan just had to work. She sniffed hard to keep her nose from aching and excused herself to the bathroom with a flask of whisky.

Nadia and Eric waited until Lexi had disappeared before sneaking out to their rental car. The reception in the basement of the church had been a pleasant affair, plenty of laughing and dancing along with a stirring rendition of the song titled "Basement Talk," which had quickly become Nadia's favourite song. The language was heinous, but most that were offended were too young to really understand. Both sets of parents were appalled at the language the newlyweds possessed, but Nadia and Eric hardly cared. The reception now over, they ducked out early, driving through the snow with hardly contained mirth. Every few seconds one of them would laugh, and this would spur the other. For the next two weeks, she had Eric all to herself, and now that her family and his family and their friends had seen they were serious about the other they didn't have to worry about being snickered at. Eric parked the car outside the villas and sighed.

"Ready for wedding night? You aren't," he paused, taking Nadia's hand seriously, "afraid, darling?"

Nadia gave him a cool look. "I brought the whip."

He clapped a hand to his leg. "Hot DAMN!"

They scrabbled out of the car, Eric stripping his tie and jacket as Nadia held up the bottom of her dress with a free hand. They took all their things in three trips, finally locking the car and taking a real look at their surroundings. French vanilla flavored room, Nadia mused. It was all golden and white, creams, off-whites, all beautiful. She felt the covers of the bed and smirked; satin. Eric kissed her neck and sighed.

"I honestly never thought I'd see the day when we were both married, especially to each other." He remarked.

Nadia giggled. "When exactly did you decide that you wanted to be married? That was your vow in your first year-"

"People change, Naddy. Everything you did screwed me over huge. Do I need to go into detail about how strange I acted for you?" He lifted his eyebrows to her. "Since when do I mope around after someone leaves me? Since when do tell girls I love them? Tina was the only other girl I ever loved, and she ended being a...well, she's a bitch." He shrugged it off.

Nadia worked her way from the dress, draping it on the chair next to the bed. She was standing in some tradition undergarments, all white, a nervous tic in her hands. What would it be like tonight? Rough and anxious like they'd been apart forever? Or slow and steady to celebrate the fact they had the rest of their lives for this? Eric kissed her again, playing his fingers over her navel with a smirk. Even that was adorned with white.

Lexi's plan worked.

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Three months of utter married-ness had done wonders for Nadia and Eric. It wasn't for several weeks that they had anyone over, it wasn't until Nadia sadly took down the sign for the kittens since she still had Nimue and Merlin in the house. The others had gone. Mike and Helen had made a pitstop for whatever reason after being in the area, and were surprised to see that Eric had undergone a huge transformation. It didn't reflect outside his living room, to them anyway. Where romance-Eric would grope and giggle like they'd seen him since college, this romance-Eric was clingy and kissy, always a grin on his face when Nadia was near. She was the same way, only she would say the same phrase in French to him, which he'd catch in his hand and pocket with a dreamy smile. They would often spend their weekends out and about, and weeknights curled up together in any room that happened to be closest.

Nadia had been home sick for the fifth day in a row, her face still pale and sickly as she threw up again, hand on her forehead. She flushed and stood, wiping her miserable face with a cool cloth.

"Damnit all..." She mumbled as a knock came at the door.

She opened it to see Lexi, grinning at her mechanically. "Hey girl, you still sick? I brought you something..."

Soup. How thoughtful. Nadia took the soup and thanked Lexi, letting her in. They made small talk for a while, but Lexi was bouncing out of her shoes at that precise second. Nadia's face went a gross shade of green, and as she hurled, she heard Lexi cluck her tongue.

"You might be preggers, Naddy."

Nadia choked and sputtered, sitting up quickly. Her glasses were skewed on her face, her sweat beading at her brow. How the hell did Lexi think that? Unless! Nadia seized her birth-control pack and opened it. Little white pills, and as she lifted one, she felt a sinking sensation. Baby aspirin! Lexi smirked at her.

"Eric's in trouble-"

"YOU BITCH!" Nadia shrieked, throwing her expert punches left and right. Lexi screamed in terror, lifting her hands to avoid blows which had already struck. She stumbled from the house and ran to her car, mouth bleeding. Nadia locked the house behind her, ignoring her awful clothes as she threw the car into gear and sped off for an emergency appointment for Doctor Greenwood.

She begged the receptionist and the doctor saw her. She sat nervously, telling the nurse it was the only reason she was there. One trip to the bathroom later she was sitting nervously in the room again, picking at scabs on her fingers, gnawing her lip. She began to tear up, her terror mounting. If Lexi really had done it to her, what's to say she hadn't poisoned her? What's to say she hadn't tried to hurt Eric? What's to say she could stand having a baby? Nadia sobbed; she wasn't ready for this, not even close. She had a job, her husband had a job! She felt sick and suicidal as the doctor entered the room, unsure remorse and joy on his face.

"Definitely pregnant," was his diagnosis, and Nadia burst into heavy sobs. He consoled her, puzzled by this. She was married, wasn't she? She explained to him all her problems, and he gave her her prenatals, wishing her good luck and telling her it wasn't going to be nearly as bad as she thought it would be. Nadia could hardly see straight as she drove home. The second car, they'd have to sell it to have enough money for the baby, the baby's college fund. Eric's car was in the driveway. She sobbed harder and slumped into the house, collapsing upon entrance.

Eric gasped and ran to her side. "Nadia, what's the matter? I was worried sick about you-"

"Lexi wants to hurt us, Eric, she's trying to tear us apart!" Nadia sobbed, clawing at her face. "She switched my pills! I'm pregnant! ME!"

His heart thudded painfully. What? What? WHAT?!

"She what?!" He asked, shaking her.

Nadia cried harder. "Switched my birth control with baby aspirin! I'm pregnant, Eric, and I'm not ready for it! Oh, God, please..." She tried to slump into oblivion unsuccessfully.

Eric's face fell. "We'll be fine, I promise, Nadia. I'll love you, I love you! The baby-" His voice cracked as he rubbed his face hard. "We'll love the baby, won't we?" He shook her harder. "Please answer!"

"I HATE MYSELF! I JUST WANT TO DIE!" She screamed at him, eyes shut against his tears.

"Don't you do this to me! Don't you break down! I love you Nadia, you're not going crazy with me here. I'll love you and the baby, don't worry, please stop crying, it'll be alright..." He begged, holding her close. She allowed him to rock her to sleep, sobbing nonetheless.

Eric placed her in their bed and stared sadly at her, wiping at his face as if some creature had curled there and died. He wanted off, away, and yet there for her. He couldn't move in case she woke up alone, frightened, suicidal! Christ, when did things get so complicated? Why was she so upset by something that caused so much joy for others? And above all, why hadn't he felt elation? Worries arose. They'd have to sell the second car, they'd probably have to move into a bigger house, maybe buy a minivan... Thinking like this only made him feel worse, and he found himself staring at her stomach without emotion.

Her eyes opened through the clear lenses and her pouted lips shot upwards into a very fake grin. "Why hello!"

He couldn’t smile. "Are you alright?"

"No, but I'm going to pretend like nothing's wrong and I'll be just fine. Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got to go throw up." She stood and stared at the bathroom door with a woozy passion. He helped her along and heard himself apologise endlessly for putting her through this, for not knowing better. She only gave him a dangerously pissed off look and closed the door behind her with a snap, locking it.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Nadia was four months pregnant. She looked at her stomach, which was starting to hang out from her jeans like a pitiful bubble, and she decided she hated it. The end of March, which meant she had lovely summer to look forward too, and school ended. She had called her mother and explained her fears, and had the worst feeling, one which could only be consoled by the Scarlett O'Hara notion that everything would be alright if she could just bury her face in the folds of her mother's dress and cry. Oh how Nadia want to cry and be held by her mother's firm hands!

Eric had become very protective of her, very protective and very defensive. A harsh word to her from the boys and he was glaring at them heatedly, a nasty feat. Nadia had a sinking feeling he hadn't breathed a word to them for whatever reason and felt ashamed to be his again. He told them a fair bit about her, his first feelings about her after their kiss, but not about their baby? She wanted to scream. Sure, he'd promised he'd love her AND the baby just like he knew he could, but would he?

With a sigh of inarticulate rage and weepiness, she scribbled a note on the refrigerator pad and took up her things. Merlin mewled pathetically as Nimue raced away from him and Nadia wanted fiercely to kick one of them, shut them both up. Instead she slammed the door and took her fat self to the airport, to Paris, to home, to her mother's protective hands and her soft skirt. Her eyes began to warm themselves up on the ride over.

When Eric walked into the house, something wasn't right. It was completely silent, so silent he could hear the kittens' footfalls as Nimue and Merlin traipsed about the carpeted living room. He stared at them with silent confusion. Had she run out for errands? Where was the car? He walked around the whole house and checked every room, panic welling up when he saw her drawers open, her toothbrush gone. Where had she GONE? He walked by her note several times before seeing it, and when he did, her loopy handwriting carved the words into the back of his eyes.

"Eric, I'm going home for a while. Don't know when I'll be back, I left a phone number in case something happens. Don't call unless there's a problem; I'll call you tonight and tell you what's going on. I'm sorry, but I couldn't stand being there one more second, I hope you can understand. Nadia."

There was no endearment, no "Love," or even "Sincerely," for that matter! He felt despair again. What on EARTH was she doing running home to France? He didn't remember exactly what she'd told him about taking up the job for Cambridge for another year, but it sounded like she'd have to come back by August. His heart pounded. She wasn't really going to be gone for three months, he reasoned with himself. I love her too much.

Nadia sat at her mother's feet, face buried in the soft folds of the black skirt, tears spilling freely, her glasses in her left hand while her mother balefully ran her hand over her daughter's head.

"I can't do this," Nadia muttered, trying to remain strong though her courage had failed her.

Her mother sighed. "The first child is always scary, Nadia! You must keep a straight face and hope for the best. You and Eric shall make wonderful parents, you've got more than enough love for one child."

"And not enough time! What am I going to do? Nurse it at school? Leave Eric with it when we're home?"

"That's part of the process! It's all a big game of push and pull, push for time, pull away for space."

"I don't want to play, I'd rather play sex and party for a few more years."

Nadia's mother made a face. "Don't say that, dear. You can play that when you're my age, for God's sake! Child-rearing happens in the prime of life, so you can give them the best years of your life. If they don't appreciate it you're not doing your job."

"I'm a horrible person!" Nadia smirked, feeling gently for her mother's hand, which grasped her tightly.

"You were my angel, Nadia. Naddy-angel was your dad's nickname for you, or do you forget?"

Nadia shook her head. "No, I don't forget, Maman."

"Good girl," her mother murmured and kissed her daughter on the cheek. "If you're lucky," she continued, "your child will love you like you love us and you'll be as proud of it like we are of you."

Just like that she had courage. She felt a little weak and ill-fated still, and of course she hadn't heard a breath from Lexi since she'd beaten the shit out of her in her home, but it was an unspoken hatred. Lexi had flopped over the edge of jealousy into insanity. Between guessing Nadia was sick when she hadn't been speaking to her for about a week, suggesting her pregnancy, and instantly accusing Eric, Nadia had speculated it was Lexi's doing, to tear Eric and she apart. Well, it wouldn't work! She needed space, but that didn't mean they had separated! "I sure hope she doesn't seek him out while I'm gone, God knows what Eric thinks about me leaving..." She thought this carefully as she dialed her home phone number and got the answering machine.

"Hi Eric, listen, I know I promised I'd talk to you tonight, so call me when you get this, I promise I'll talk to you for as long as you like then. Love you, bye." She hung up and sighed loftily.

Her father, who had been walking by, had smiled softly at her and said something about how beautiful Nadia's baby would look. She smiled at her father and blew him a kiss before retreating to her room. The number she'd given Eric would ring the phone in the hall outside her bedroom, therefore she'd hear it at any hour in the night.

She lay awake, hand on her slightly swelled stomach, eyes wide but without her glasses. Everything was a little fuzzy, a little out of focus, a little dulled around the edges. She experimented by tuning them on something nearby and untuning them quickly, deciphering shapes and such with ease. She felt weak bumps, like half-hearted kicks in her stomach and wondered briefly if that was normal. She didn't want to end up like Carmen and have kids that got the hiccups inside her, it was a strange experience to see Carmen’s stomach jerk a little, a bump through her taut skin, and then Carmen would smile and say something about hiccups. Another bump, this one harder. Too young to be kicking, Nadia mused and wondered if it was an alien. Or just a boy.

The phone rang, interrupting her reverie, and Nadia, in a haze of color and fuzzy edges, picked up the phone and held it to her ear.

"Bonjour,"

"Nadia! What-?"

"Eric!" She replied happily, holding the phone closer.

"Why did you leave? What's going on?" He sounded hurt.

She wouldn't let that make her smile falter, and grinned in a happy way. "I just had to get out of Bloomington for a while, and I wanted to see my mother. She's cheered me up a bit, Eric, I'll be okay when I come home."

"So, are you coming home tomorrow then?" He sounded hopeful, wanting to keep a close eye on her again.

"No, I'll be here for three weeks probably."

"Three weeks?" He asked, incredulous.

She nodded. "Yeah, it's just good to be home, and my mother's more understanding about my worries than Carmen. Tough love is not what I need." She toyed with the phone cord. "I didn't leave you, I'm taking a vacation from the area, not you. If I could have brought you I would have." She lied about the last part; she still felt like the only thing she needed was to let her frustrations out on her mother, no one else, not burden Eric with her worries or her depression.

"I can call you tomorrow, can't I?"

"You don't need to hear me every day, do you? I'd like some time alone with my mother, without interruptions. Please, let me call you the day after tomorrow. Don't call here anymore, I'll call you!" She sounded hysterically. Eric replied (in quite a gloomy voice) that he wouldn't call anymore.

He had always been like that, protective and considerate, but this was like that times one hundred. With a baby of his in Nadia's womb, he felt like he had to double his efforts and she was blocking him out.

"See you in three weeks," Nadia chirped and told him she loved him before hanging up without hearing a word from his gloomy lips.

Three weeks dissolved into a month, which faded into two, and then two more weeks. She was spending every waking second learning valuable information about birthing and raising children from her mother, all the necessary stories from her childhood, like what her mother had done, letting her find what she thought looked beautiful instead of reading fashion magazines. A few picture albums revealed Nadia and Lexi at a younger age, their jet black heads glued together, faces bright with laughter, the only difference easily seen were Nadia's ridiculously thick, black glasses, which hadn't changed since she was nine. The sizes had varied, but they'd always been square, black, thick frames that matched her hair. She touched her current frames and smiled wearily.

At the end of two-and-a-half months (and, if she were Eric, sixteen hours, forty-eight minutes, and thirty-seven seconds), Nadia retreated home. She gathered her things and got on the plane home, thanking her mother; the feeling of persecution and uneasiness took its place again as she sat in her seat. An uncomfortable silence enveloped her mind. Six and a half months.

Eric sat at home, beer in hand, all the other Pythons littered around him, shifting uncomfortably. She'd been gone for over two months and hadn't called for about two weeks; naturally Eric was a little worried, but he looked at ease. They all wanted to know what was wrong, what had been wrong since that Monday he'd walked into work and had fallen to the floor with a careful shriek, hands over his face. Worry had consumed him, worry of Nadia's suicidal tendencies, of her sudden self-loathing, and of her rejection of their CHILD, the perfection of the two of them in one being, the only part of them they would leave behind to spread; it was almost a kick to the face. He longed to tell Graham, who always seemed to be able to work out a logical explanation, but Nadia had moped around for weeks, not allowing anyone to touch her, nothing to see her until she had thrown on the loosest clothes she could find to hide her barely grown belly. It had happened so quickly, the pregnancy. And that bitch Lexi had had the guts to walk up to him while he was moping around London looking for someplace to sit down and collect his thoughts.

"Alone?" She asked, grinning to bear a scabbed lip.

He curled his lip slowly. "Piss off, wench."

The hurt look he expected didn't come as she hefted a small compact and wrinkled her nose. "Suit yourself, but you know where I am when she kills herself. She'll be creative about it too, you know. Maybe she'll make a sculpture from her bones and brains, or draw you a picture with her blood-"

The memory of her flicking open the compact to reveal a good amount of cocaine stuck in Eric's mind, and the rage that had built up over him had subsided instantly. Drugs had done this to Lexi, not her mind. She had snorted the white powder up right in front of him and smiled dreamily, as if remembering something that never happened. Despite the hell, the absolute pain she put him through, he walked away without another harsh word and without a backward glance.

"So," Gray cleared his throat nervously, "where's Nadia off to, Eric? You never told us."

"Parents'," he replied gruffly, lighting up a cigarette. "Visitin' her mother."

"Ah,"

"What's wrong with her?" Mike then asked, eyes narrowing as Eric started to give him the death glare.

Eric shrugged. "She had some matters to attend to with her mother and didn't want me to go. She kept saying she wasn't leaving me, though, and she'd come back soon. Here I am two months later," he grumbled quietly to himself after trailing off and bit his finger as he removed the cigarette.

As if that had been some important cue, Nadia walked in and deposited her bags on the sofa, humming a dreary tune and keeping her back to them. She turned and Eric's face literally shone brighter than the sun; he stood and started towards her, not quite able to pretend he hadn't seen her figure had swelled considerably in the last few months. But God, she was still beautiful. The others gaped fully, having not seen her in such a long time, and to see her like this, in such a position! She smiled carefully at them, keeping her eyes low.

Eric gasped. "Is it kicking?"

Nadia's face darkened. "Breeding itty bitty football players, honestly, Eric."

He laughed, the first real laugh they'd heard in what seemed like ages. "Didn't get it from me, trust me!"

Nadia giggled. "Maybe it's a kickboxer."

His eyes sparkled, but not with mischief or some ulterior motive, just happy she wasn't so sad, so fearful, and so bloody fragile. She'd shaken this; they could take anything.